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Tunnel Vision

by MONOWHALES

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1.
CTRL^^^ 02:39
I like to be in control I like to be in control I like to be in control Tell me bout the future, I don’t wanna be late  Tearin’ out the sutures while we start to relate Firefight with my ego I’m gone lemme go Blind eye to the people and I’m out on my own I don’t wanna believe it  Don’t wanna admit my mistakes And I don’t wanna believe it  Don’t wanna be put in my place Same time same fate  I’m on my way  Don’t know what you’ve been told  Cause baby I’m  Super fast   Super cold  Super cool I like to be in control I like to be in control I like to be in control Rise up like the Lazarus tryna carry my weight  Pacin’ through the labyrinth lookin’ for an escape  Semiautomatic Episodic manic  Super fast   Super cold  Super cool I don’t wanna believe it  Don’t wanna admit my mistakes And I don’t wanna believe it  Don’t wanna be put in my place Same time same fate  I’m on my way  Don’t know what you’ve been told  Cause baby I’m  Super fast   Super cold  Super cool I like to be in control I like to be in control I like to be in control I like to be in control I like to be in control (I like to be, I like to be) I’m on my way to the same fate (I like to be, I like to be) I got control on the brain I know what I like to be I like to be in control
2.
You got the best of me Make no apologies, too bad In any quantity I want it, I want it And everyone I meet They’re all afraid of me baby Looks like I got my way (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) I’m chained like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) Chained up like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) I’m chained like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) Chained up like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal What’s wrong with vanity? Can’t get enough of it baby New age lobotomy  I want it, I want it It’s right in front of me Too bad the history runs deep Looks like it got away (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) I’m chained like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) Chained up like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) I’m chained like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) Chained up like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal I’m stuck in the middle I’m chained like an animal I’m stuck in the middle Don’t make me feel like a criminal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) I’m chained like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) Chained up like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) I’m chained like an animal (Don’t look back) I’m stuck in the middle (Don’t look back) Chained up like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal Stuck in the middle Chained like an animal
3.
Change### 02:49
I’ve been awake Takin’ up space All work and no play Rattlin’ bass Gas and no brakes Tryna keep pace with all this Change Nothing ever stays the same Change I need a break, a give and take, gimme some I need to get closer  Look me in the eye Don’t tell me it’s over No no no no no  Change Change What’s the new craze?  Rats in a race Taking my place I’m at the gate Keepin’ it straight Under the weight of all this Change Nothing ever stays the same Change I don’t need to change it I need to get closer Look me in the eye  Don’t tell me it’s over No no no no no Change Change Little bit colder When I’m alone
Not looking for closure No no no Need to get closer Can’t do it alone Don’t tell me it’s over No no no no no Don’t tell me it’s over No no no no no Don’t tell me, Don’t tell me, Don’t tell me no Change Change Change (I’ve been awake Taking up space) Change (I’ve been awake Thinkin’ bout change)
4.
New Threads 03:46
All we’re ever after is something too good to be true All I ever ask for is everything that you won’t do Hardly moving faster burning out on a new fuse Call me a disaster but maybe I just found my groove I got these new threads                  Kicking up the sidewalk I got these loose ends  Ticking like a time bomb Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a Tell me what you’re after baby I got nothing to lose Always got the answers but maybe I’ve just found my truth Yea it’s been fun but I feel it coming A hit and run I can share with someone like you I gotta know if you’re the one who’s gonna follow through I got these new threads                  Kicking up the sidewalk I got these loose ends  Ticking like a time bomb Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a Way back in school we were the up and coming But ever since it’s been the past that’s running me down Now I’m thinking that it’s time I turn it around I got these new threads                  Kicking up the sidewalk I got these loose ends  Ticking like a time bomb Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a Ticking like a
5.
RICH$$$ 02:59
So I kinda lost my mind once Fell into the line of All the people I thought were better than       You and me we’re kinda different  Not like all the same shit It’s kinda like we’re meant You know you make me feel   Not like the other boys That I just can’t avoid Fed up and paranoid You know you make me feel Not like the other girls Lost in another world Inside a polaroid You know you make me feel rich You know I kinda like it You know you make me feel So I think I lost a bad bet The kind of gold that fools get A penny less than profit is better than Spending all my time on Queen Street Feelin’ kinda ugly Seeming kinda bent You know you make me feel Not like the other boys That I just can’t avoid Fed up and paranoid You know you make me feel Not like the other girls Lost in another world Inside a polaroid You know you make me feel rich  You know I kinda like it You know you make me feel rich You know I kinda like it You know you make me feel I get lost when I’m on my way A storybook end with a different take Watching all the violence on my phone Listen to the sirens, amplifying’, hear ‘em crying, sing along You know you make me feel rich You know I kinda like it You know you make me feel rich (Not like the other boys) You know I kinda like it (That I just can’t avoid) (Fed up and paranoid) You make me feel rich I kinda like it
6.
Find me dancing in my make-up  City living with mistakes Guess I’ll catch up with you later When I start I never stop I get lost in conversation My dirty mind gets in the way Guess sometimes I’m too courageous When I start I never stop Cut me to pieces Try to knock me out Wanna shoot me down So take it or leave it  We are who we are We are who we are We are who we are who we are We take it too far A shot in the dark When I start I never stop Breaking hearts like I’m a sadist  Roman candles in the rain Thinkin’ sleep is overrated  When I start I never stop We are who we are We are who we are We are who we are who we are We take it too far A shot in the dark When I start I never stop (When I start I never stop) (Yeah, whatever) Cut me to pieces Try to knock me out Wanna shoot me down So take it or leave it  I heard you want to be with me now You think I’m up for anything somehow I’ve also heard you’re up to no good And I like that like you knew I would  We are who we are We are who we are We are who we are who we are We take it too far A shot in the dark When I start I never stop (When I start I never stop) (When I start I never stop)
7.
Tired of waiting in the rain To fool myself again Lost without a friend It’s heavy Tired of screaming in to pay phones Putting on the same clothes  Hoping that you don’t Forget me Tell me how long will it take?  Get up Get out That’s what I’m dreaming about  Grow up Get paid I’m burning out I’m burning  Well you Keep sayin’ My life is perfect but hey Under the surface Everything I do is a mistake Everything I do is a mistake Tired of giving up  Tired of let downs I’m tired of waking up to no one and no one's around                                 When I was young I thought that love’s a pill to swallow then I’d get lost, get fucked (Get lost, get fucked) Get up Get out That’s what I’m dreaming about  Grow up Get paid I’m burning out I’m burning  Well you Keep sayin’ My life is perfect but hey Under the surface Everything I do is a mistake Under the surface Everything I do is a mistake Livin’ life I didn’t want it Did my best to buy some time I don’t think I ever got it Almost outta fight Hit the lights and let me hide for a while Get up Get out That’s what I’m dreaming about  Everything I do is a mistake Grow up Get paid I’m burning out I’m burning  Everything I do is a mistake Well you Keep sayin’ My life is perfect but hey Nobody’s perfect Everything I do is a mistake Under the surface Everything I do is a mistake Nobody’s perfect Everything I do is a mistake

about

Sally:

This album saved our lives. It's hard to admit that without the making and recording of 'Tunnel Vision' I don't know if I'd still be alive. We've all been through the ringer the last few years and I was no exception. The highs were intense, but the lows even lower. The music on this record still feels like a raw cut that is slowly scabbing over as I continually work on myself.

Leading up to the studio I fell off the deep end, I holed myself up in morbid preparations and was unreachable outside my walls. Guilt drove me to showing up to the studio to finish these songs, and now in a twisted way, I'm grateful for guilt itself. We wrote and recorded this album in a time where we were all staring into static day after day, hope had faded into bleakness. I am grateful for my bandmates, friends and family who carried me and had difficult conversations with me as I waned in and out of disassociating. Fast forward to today, that cyclical thought cycle is broken. I can see a clear snapshot of how clouded and unwatered my brain was.

Truth be told, I wasn't the only one in the band suffering. We each went through our own relentless dark struggles during this time. Everyday for weeks I spent hours on the phone with Jordan trying to talk the life back into him. Even just thinking back to our conversations my heart breaks. I knew that as long as I had him on the phone, he had more minutes in the day on this earth so everyday when we'd talk, I never really wanted him to hang up. In contrast, Zach can be a very reclusive guy, but our friendships run deep. Even if nothing is said, we intuitively know when Zach is going through it and we try to support him in the best ways we could.

Throughout the process of writing, rehearsing, recording and making this album we continued to break our backs lifting each other up. We dragged each other to the finish line. Voila, here we all are to tell you that this is what our story sounded like and we are proud to have made it here to show you.

Jordan:

We made this record while we watched the world spin out of control. Sally had disappeared a week before the sessions started, so Zach and I showed up on the first day without knowing if she would be there. Ultimately, she made it to the session, and we started the month-long process of recording ‘Tunnel Vision’

The vibe in the studio was apocalyptic. Everyone was wearing masks in the control room as the Delta wave swept through Toronto, pushing numbers over 4000 cases a day. Social media and the news were constant sources of fear and division. I was having conversations online with people who were telling me live music was a thing of the past and that livestream shows are the future. No one was certain there would be a music industry left by the time this album was finished. Halfway through the sessions we got word that the studio might have to close, essentially killing our record since our producer would have to fly back to the USA. This feeling came out in lyrics I was writing at the time (in our song “Change###”) - all we could do was focus on 'keeping it straight, under the weight of all this change"

Through much of the recording process, Sally and I were rebuilding our relationship as I did my best to support her during one of the most difficult periods of her life. We didn’t want to lose her, and I spent a lot of time on the roof of the studio, talking through her feelings and doing my best to show her she had reasons to carry on living. Sally and I have known each other since we were in high school, and our relationship runs deeper than most. This closeness has been a source of pain for us at times, but it also helped me to be there for her when she needed me most. Little did I know that I would be where she was only a few months later, and the roles would reverse, with Sally talking me through some of my darkest times as I got dangerously close to the edge.

The making of ‘Tunnel Vision’ was a lifeline for all of us. I was doing my best to emotionally support Sally to show up every day and finish these songs, hoping against hope that if she could get to the finish line, that might bring about some positive change for her. I was also trying to empower Zach to be as hands-on with the production as possible, realizing his visions for the songs and giving the band its identity through his ability to filter our sometimes haphazard suggestions into a sound that we can all be proud of. By the time the album was finished, I had drifted into a dark place, retreating from the outside world and all contact with news, social media, and friends. Sally and Zach picked up the slack and kept the band moving forward, as friends and family intervened to prevent me from taking my own life. I struggle sometimes to wrap my head around going from experiencing those depths to playing some of the biggest shows of my life, winning a JUNO, and releasing this album. Maybe some part of me had to die to really appreciate what all this means. I’m just glad I’m still here to share this experience with Sally, Zach, and all the friends and fans of the band that have supported us through it all.

Zach:

We always say we’re a collaborative songwriting unit, and those words couldn’t be more true for “Tunnel Vision”. We wrote over 40 songs before choosing the final 7. We gave each other space to be openly creative. We worked really hard to rebuild our trust in each other, and that work really speaks for itself when you hear Sally straight up killing it on tracks like “CTRL^^^”

I really didn’t want to make a record again if it was going to be like “Control Freak” or “Daytona Bleach”. I was just so done with that process. It always felt like nobody was happy, and I definitely wasn’t in love with the way we were working. We were tearing each other's hair out for years. Enough is enough, let’s try something different. This might have been working before, but it didn’t feel sustainable and it was time for a change. It was a risk, but I think it’s definitely worth the reward. There is no right way to do art, but we’re finally settling into a way that works for Sally, Jordan, and myself. I don’t think we would’ve arrived here if it wasn’t for a global pandemic either. So there’s a silver lining for me.

credits

released September 9, 2022

Produced by Dave Schiffman
Recorded by Dave Schiffman at Dream House
Additional Engineering by Calvin Hartwick, Zach Zanardo, and Jordan Circosta
Edited by Darren McGill
Mixed by Dave Schiffman
Mastered by Howie Weinberg and Will Borza at Howie Weinberg Mastering

MONOWHALES are:

Sally Shaar - Vocals, Synthesizers
Zach Zanardo - Guitar, Bass, Synthesizers, Sound Design, Background Vocals
Jordan Circosta - Drums, Percussion, Bass, Synthesizers, Background Vocals

Music and Lyrics by MONOWHALES

Additional Writers:
Robert Stephenson - Tracks 1, 2
Ryan Worsley - Track 3, 6
Stefan Babcock- Track 5

Album Art by Amy White

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MONOWHALES Toronto, Ontario

Sally Shaar
Jordan Circosta
Zach Zanardo

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